five lbs in five good days

just a brief update.
checked the scale at the end of the day (sunday).  111.0
        i've lost at least 5 pounds in the past 5 days.  why did i ever stop restricting before?  the happiness i get from a lower number on the scale every day is incomparable to most other things in my life.  for one, that's how i know i'm not right, in a conventional sense.  on the other hand, it makes it easier to eat less, easier to lose, and still makes me happier in general.  i feel like since i haven't even come close to a binge for these past five days, it's like i've surpassed it.  i'm either fasting or doing only 100 calories tomorrow.  i haven't decided.  but i know i won't go over that.  i turned down so much food today (tons of candy, cookies, a bagel) and i can sit at dinner and not eat a thing, just sipping my diet coke or water.  hunger means nothing to me.  i know if i eat anyway, it will only be a little, which won't make the hunger go away, so it's pointless.  god how i've missed this control.  i haven't really felt it so strongly since i was a junior in high school.


also:  i like this losing way too much.


lovee,
anastasia kirstyn

(surprised at how easy this is becoming)

(and way too happy about it for me to be a normal person)

whatever. i'm gonna ride this out as long as it lasts for me.