checked the scale at the end of the day (sunday). 111.0
i've lost at least 5 pounds in the past 5 days. why did i ever stop restricting before? the happiness i get from a lower number on the scale every day is incomparable to most other things in my life. for one, that's how i know i'm not right, in a conventional sense. on the other hand, it makes it easier to eat less, easier to lose, and still makes me happier in general. i feel like since i haven't even come close to a binge for these past five days, it's like i've surpassed it. i'm either fasting or doing only 100 calories tomorrow. i haven't decided. but i know i won't go over that. i turned down so much food today (tons of candy, cookies, a bagel) and i can sit at dinner and not eat a thing, just sipping my diet coke or water. hunger means nothing to me. i know if i eat anyway, it will only be a little, which won't make the hunger go away, so it's pointless. god how i've missed this control. i haven't really felt it so strongly since i was a junior in high school.
also: i like this losing way too much.
(surprised at how easy this is becoming)
(and way too happy about it for me to be a normal person)
whatever. i'm gonna ride this out as long as it lasts for me.