i am sick of being unwanted
(aside from my physicality)
i hate myself
i can't stop physically hurting myself.
(thin red lines found their way into my arms again tonight,
i thought i'd decided to just do thighs. i can't help it.)
the only thing i have control over
is getting thinner.
my turn.
boy, stop fucking me up. i can't do it anymore.
it hurts so much.
I would say please stop hurting yourself, but as a former cutter, I know that advice is easier said than done. Think of it this way: are the people who are upsetting you and making you cut worth your blood? Are they worth your tears and your energy? They probably don't deserve any of it.
ReplyDeleteOoh. Good point by Alice. I'm a cutter too, and have a hard time not sounding like a total hypocrite when telling other girls not to. But she's right. Usually the bullshit getting me upset isn't worth my blood, and I'd be willing to bet its not worth yours, either.
ReplyDeleteStay strong, skinny love!
You'll get your resolve back.
peace
Yep very good point alice.
ReplyDeleteShe's right.
Apart from that:
boys can fuck you up. Yes. Even when you don't expect it. Or when you think: Ah you CANNOT fuck me up. That's good. And then they do.
But why cry over it?
Use them.
As a motivation.
That's what I do.
Just don't cry. And don't cut.
Hey
ReplyDeleteI hope you're okay now :\ Be strong
Holly (I'm a new follower :) )
Please delete this picture. Its mine and I'm the model, you never asked me to use it. This photo was made against anorexia and not for a blog like yours. delete it and mabye you can think about asking when you use photos.
ReplyDelete